Thursday, January 26, 2012

a visit to my Endo

I saw my diabetes specialist today.  It was probably one of the easiest appointments I've ever had.  I had to take my almost 4 year old with me but he fell asleep about 2 minutes out and slept in my arms the whole time.  I didn't get weighed in or my blood pressure checked because I was holding my sleeping "baby".  My bp has been excellent recently and it's usually only slightly high when I'm pregnant.  Yea for not having bp problems!  My weight has also decreased and I was only slightly sad I didn't get to weigh in to prove it. 

ANYWAY, last time I went in, the doc had me do a full lipid pannel and 24 hour urine collection- on the fun things you get to do when you're diabetic!  Today we went over those results and all of my tests were really good.  My A1C today was a 7.0.  I was hoping for a 6.8 but I'm still happy with 7.0.  All of my lipids were normal and I'm so happy that I don't have high cholesterol either.  The LAST thing I want is another medication to take!  The only test that was a little off, but still in normal range, was my Vitamin D.  Usually Vitamin D isn't tested in patients and mine had never been tested before.  So, he went ahead and had it run with the rest of my blood work.  It was within the normal range but a little on the low side.  I have NO idea what that means or anything but Dr. Day didn't seem too concerned about it. 

I pretty much told doc that I have stopped taking Symilin.  He wasn't too surprized, or concerned so I guess that's okay too.  He increased my basal, like always.  I'll make the changes, be low for 3 days striaght and lower them back again.  It's a common cycle.  But I'm not too worried about it. 

He asked me if I was planning another pregnancy.  When you're diabetic, you HAVE to plan, plan, plan for pregnancy, and you cannot just "accidentally" get pregnant either.  In the past, I've begged my insurance company to cover birth control in the past and didn't hesitate to have Dr. Day write me a letter of neccesity.  Usually, and currently, however, it has been covered.  But I digress, I told him I have started thinking about maybe having another one.  I aksed him what he thought, if I were healthy enough.  He said I was healthy enough, and young enough, but that I did need to get my A1C down to a 6.5 or less. 

I've GOT to make this decision in a year or less.  Why?  Well, because little brother is almost 4 and I'm opposed to having a kid farther than 5 years difference from him.  Since he was born, I've struggled with this decision.  I always thought I'd have more than 2 kids.  But somehow, it seems like enough for me.  I had a really, really hard time recovering from my second c-section.  Pregnancy is mega, super hard when you're diabetc.  Do you hear me rambling?  That's me trying to make a decision.  Husband told me JUST TODAY that I'm terrible at making decisions.  I am.  (but so is he).  ANYWAY, I'd love to have a baby girl.  or boy, maybe.  But I just don't know if I'm up for it. 
It means testing my sugar every 2 hours for about a year.  That's 4,382 tests.  It means wearing a CGM.  It means GAINING WEIGHT.  Lots of weight.  And I'm already 25 pounds over weight.  It means DELIVERING a baby.  It means having ANOTHER c-section.  And then RECOVERING from that surgery.  It means sleepless nights.  But, it also means another wonderful, beautiful, special human being in my family.  I just don't know!  I wish God would come down and just TELL me.  "Jen, you need to have another baby."  Or, "Jen, it's  okay, you're family is complete."  I just have not received an answer on that prayer.  And I've prayed about it for four years. 

Anyway, I really feel like 2012 is OUR YEAR.  It's our year for change.  Could be another baby, could not.  We'll just have to wait and see.  :) 

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